God just built me that way...those were the words that Matthew said to me this morning and they spoke volumes.
I’ve always struggled with verbalizing what I believe when it comes to the teachings of my faith especially to people who don’t believe the same. I’ve believed and have always believed the teachings of the Catholic faith. As the years have gone by, I’ve forgotten half the teachings but on faith I knew I still believed. A friend of mine, last week, challenged me on just what it is I believe and what the Catholic Church teaches. I could not, with any clarity, conviction or firm reasoning state why I believed what I did. He basically suggested that maybe I should read and perhaps see if my views were still the same.
Last week found me at Barnes and Noble looking for "The Catechism of the Catholic Church". I saw "Catholic for Dummies" but chose to forgo that option and get one that I’d truly have to concentrate on. I’ve been a Catholic Dummy long enough! I began reading and am still reading. I’m not yet at the point that I can argue anything but at least I’m a bit more informed with my faith. I still believe in my heart what I’ve always believed. That was a good feeling.
I found myself in church with a feeling that "this is where I belong". It’s a place I’ve always gone when I’m sad, hurt or feeling a little unsure of myself. To sit in the presence of the only being that truly knows me.
Now when questioned about why I believe and I don’t have all the answers, the best answer shall be:
"God just built me that way....."