Another date story

I have not bored you guys with a date story in a while so I’m long overdue. This one is very short and sweet.

I was supposed to have a second follow up date last night with a new friend that I met last week. He was supposed to call me and confirm the plans, etc. The only problem is I assume he lost my home number, all my email addresses, cell number and fax number. I’m sure he also didn’t know smoke signals nor did he have a pigeon because I did not hear a word from him. I’m assuming that I was stood up. Well this morning I know I was stood up because I received an email stating that he had family problems. I’m sure there is more to it than that OR he’d have used any of the aforementioned forms of communication to let me know this, but fear not J-landers, I did not let the night waste. I was fortunate enough to have a female friend who ironically also got stood up last night...I wonder if it is the same guy?

Her and I carried ourselves over to the Atchafalaya Club in Henderson. For those of you who can’t pronounce Atchafalaya....let me help you. A chaf a lie ya. (The "t" is silent) I know I should have been an English teacher.

Playing at the Atchafalaya Club was Travis Matte and the Zydeco Kingpins. www.travismatte.com  MY friend and I were in the mood for shaking our booty so we found ourselves a dancing partner. We did not mind sharing him but it was I who got asked for my phone number. So not all was lost! I don’t know why I bother but he asked so I gave it.

I quit drinking about 2 hours before I left because I knew I had to drive an hour to get home. I am not a big drinker and I’m very cautious about drinking and driving. When I arrived back into my home town  the APD decided to have a DUI checkpoint. Never in my life have I ever been tested for alcohol consumption. When they stopped me and asked if I had been drinking, I was honest with them and told them that, yes, I had drank two coronas about 2 hours previously. The officer told me that I would have to pull over to be tested. I had no clue what this entailed but I was getting ready to find out. Here is the ensuing dialog:

Officer: "Mame, please get your drivers license and step out of the car."

Me: "Okay Officer"

Officer " What do you have in that container"

Me " Sir, that is watered down ice that I got before I left the bar" Anyone who knows me knows I love to chew ice but the officer thought I was lying so he had to sniff it. Water indeed.

Officer: "Step over here I’m going to have to test you"

Me: "Yes sir Officer!"

Officer: "I need you to follow my finger"

Me: (I really wanted to pass the test!) : "Hmmm...Sir where is it going and would you mind giving me directions ."

He wasn’t amused.

I passed the test and even though I passed they wanted to know if I knew someone who could come and get me. I told him that I was stood up tonight and if I can’t get a date to take me out what made him think I could find someone to take me home?

The officer hollers at one of his fellow officers and says "Dane, you said you think you know her?"

Dane: "Yes, I know her!  I've seen her on myspace.com" 

Me:  "Thank you Dane and tell your mother I said hi!" 

Alleluia Dane you saved my ass from having to find someone to come get me.