A daughter only a mother can love.

I have been long overdue in writing about my lovely daughter. Although, I felt her grow inside of my womb for 9 months and I saw her being pulled from within me, she has to be someone else's child. I know for a fact that I was never a party to any of the things she did not learn in her youth. I was a very informative mother giving her all the knowledge she needed in order to live in this cold and cruel world. She most definitely gets her unconsciousness from her father. That's my story and I'm sticking to it!

A few stories I must relate to you before I get to the granddaddy of them all. All of these occurrences happened when she was old enough to have gleaned information from her surroundings and should have had knowledge of them without being told.

The first one is probably easily shrugged off as probably not thinking. My mother had an 8 acre family fish pond and we had a camper trailer that we would frequent in the summer months. One such time we had left the camper to go to Sunday mass and it was pouring down raining when we returned and my father realized he had locked the keys inside of the trailer.

My dad is a very grouchy individual and it was lunch time and the manna (that communion host wasn't going far) was inside of the trailer. He was cursing about having left the keys inside and I'm sure Brandi, my daughter's focus, was mainly on the key being inside of the trailer. Dad comes up with the idea that Brandi is the smallest person ( not the brightest but the smallest LOL I love you Brandi) so he will put her through the window.

Bear in mine that all she is thinking is that the keys are inside of the trailer. Imagine my hungry Dad, in the pouring rain, grouchy as a bear, getting soaked and my daughter finally arrives safely through window and innocently asked:

"Okay Pawpa, where's the keys?"

My dad's response is "Open the son of a bitchin door!"

Yep, she was going to find the keys, crawl out the window and deposit them into my father's soaked hands.

Story Number two also includes my father. I think the man is an instigator.

My lovely little angel was watching Monday night football with us. The game was being played in New Jersey and her step brother was stationed in New Jersey.She was about 14 at the time and the cameraman shows a view of the big beautiful full moon. And my daughter gets excited over the smallest of things and watching a football game which was being played in New Jersey where her step brother was...that was a big happening for her.

My dad was clowning her and says "I wonder if we have a full moon too?" Yes, you guessed...she went and looked.

Story Number three is possibly my favorite story because it's so ridiculous. She, once again is 13 or so. Her favorite country music star at the time is Clay Walker and we are headed for a concert in Beaumont Texas. It is very cold. The wind is bitingly damp and miserable and no amount of clothes can generate enough body heat. Ice is forming on the windshield and my daughter is worried about making it to the concert on time. All our lives, we have heard about the "wind chill factor". Depending on temperature and how hard the winds are blowing determines the wind child factor, right? Wrong. My daughter decides to ask us at that point how do they measure the "windshield factor"? What kind of tool do they use? After, I laughed my ass off, I was no longer cold.

Story Number 4 is more recent and I shared it in an entry. It had to do with her not realizing the mechanics of a "see and say". Here is the story if you care to read it

.See and Say

Now the granddaddy of them all happened this past weekend. My daughter calls me immediately afterward to relate the story. Mom you will never believe what I didn't know. I said "Oh God Brandi, what now?" I have time and time again told my daughter, if she doesn't know something, please ask her mother first. It is imperative, in order, not to look foolish to check with mom. Mom knows all. She doesn't listen very well.

My 23 year old daughter is at her in laws for the Thanksgiving holiday. Her mother in law has apparently made a "to die for" cornbread dressing. I don't know about you guys in this world but I've always called cornbread dressing, cornbread dressing. Simple, right? Self explanatory, right? No need for explanations, right? Wrong!

My daughter asked "NeNe (that's what they call her mother in law) exactly what is cornbread dressing made out of?"

I said "oh no Brandi, please tell me you are joking? How could you possibly not know that or even realize that?"

It's something you just don't think about doing, is sitting your child down and saying "Brandi, my darling, there is something mom needs to tell you, Cornbread Dressing is made out of cornbread."

I have failed as a mother. I admit it.

Here is a pic of that lovely face and smile that occurs when she's overwhelmed with newfound knowledge. That sparkle she gets when she once again realizes she is sometimes mentally challenged.

 

Men o Pause

I think this about sums it up.....no more needs to be said.

My Lost Undies Part 2 3/4

I have been asked if that previous post was a pic of me.  Yeah, it is, about 10 pounds and 30 years ago.

No!  That pic can be found on any Hanes Her Way advertisment.  If you want to see a pic of me in my Hanes Her Way, you will have to pay a hell of a lot more than you pay for AOL per month. 

It will cost you marriage, divorce, alimony and many hardaches. 

Thank God for Panty ads, eh?

My Lost Undies

I never did relate this Hurricane story to J-Land because I truly thought it was a weird occurrence. After Hurricane Rita passed, not only did it leave me without much privacy, but it left me without any underwear. In my dresser, I had many pairs of Hanes Her Way white cotton no nonsense very unsexy panties. Some panties, that no one in their right mind would want to steal. Once I reclaimed my privacy, I assumed the vortex of the hurricane had made away with my white no nonsense undies. They were no where to be found. I looked high and low for these babes only to have to give up the search. Even St. Anthony or St. Joseph wasn't helping me in the lost and found department. I'm sure, in buying new ones, I should have been adventurous and bought some that weren't so no nonsense, but it's difficult to teach an old dog new tricks.

This past weekend, I spent some time at my parents home for the holidays, and my Dad, being the nut case that he is, informs me that he has just unpacked his suitcases from his adventure at my home. He's laughingly relating to me that as he unpacks, he notices he has a suitcase full of woman's panties. I'm sure glad my mom didn't unpack for him because I'm sure that would have caused some problems in her mind.

So months later, I now have enough no nonsense panties to last a lifetime. And it was priceless seeing him walk down the hall with a arm full of women's panties.

My date

There probably has only been very few occasions in my life that I have met someone that I've hit it off with right away.

Sometimes you meet someone and you like the way that they look and you are physically attracted to them, there is chemistry, and they have many great qualities, but they may have so many other areas that you are not compatible with them. Those are the ones you marry and you love, but no matter how much you try, it just doesn't work out because some vital part is missing.

Or you may meet someone that you like everything that they are about, but you just don't have that chemistry that makes you click. Those are the ones that you become very good friends with. My friend Bill is a prime example of that happening and you remain great friends through thick and thin.

There are those that you meet again that are childhood loves. The ones you love dearly because you share a history together, and a very close common bond, but you quickly realize that no matter how hard you try, or how much you love them, you can't go back. Too many bridges crossed and obligations have entered your life to enable you to become what you wished you could have been with them.

Sometimes, you look at life and ask yourself, what am I looking for? What do I want and what would make me complete? As long as I can remember, I have been Catholic. I've been taught and believed there is a right way to do things and a wrong way. The Catholic church teaches and I firmly believe that sex before marriage is not right. I believe making love should be sacred and between two people who love each other and not just for the physical need of it. I believe marriage is a sacrament and I believe in the annulment process which I am going through right now. (For those who know I've been married 3 times, according to the church only #1 has to be annulled. The others are not recognized in the church as a sacrament. Also, I'm not annulling the marriage, I'm annulling the sacrament. The marriage was valid by law)

It has always been my dream to find someone and marry once again in the Catholic church. Some of you out there may ridicule my medieval ways and I respect your thoughts, but I'm not here to please you, but myself and what I believe is right. I've often erred in my ways by trying to conform to other people's beliefs and my own fleshy ways. I believe that's where most of my sadness has manifested itself in not doing what my heart truly believes. I would always give in to the flesh.

In searching for a lifetime partner, I believe your common morals and values should be similar. And if they are not, you should at least respect the other for their beliefs and help them along their personal journey. Not just lip talk but in action as well. I have come across many men who have talked the talk but when it came time to walk the walk, well lets just say they fell short and so have I.

Enter another kind of guy, one who believes what you believe, and you are physically, mentally and spiritually attracted to him. He wants all the same things you want. He's not scared to tell you all of his faults and imperfections. He lays them out on the table for you just in case you may not be able to deal with them. He is not scared to share his faith and he's not afraid to say, when and if he ever marries again, it will be the right way (according to our beliefs which doesn't mean yours isn't right). In the Catholic church and if he has his way the relationship will not be consummated until the wedding night. He's also intelligent enough to realize that having met me, it's going to be damned difficult to uphold those morals and values, but if he has someone as strong willed about it as he is, and God is firmly planted between us, then I think it's very possible should things happen to head in that direction for us.

Okay, we just met yesterday, and I damned sure didn't expect to click with someone 7 years younger than me. I was just out to have a good time and he was handsome, ex-marine, fine as wine and I didn't even think he'd look at me twice. Of course none of that mattered, what mattered most, was his religious views. That's what made him most attractive to me and the fact that he had clean fingernails... (now you guys know I couldn't go through an entire entry without saying something off key)

It's definitely too damned soon to predict anything, but God is orchestrating my life and he's done a damned good job of it so far, I will let him continue doing his magic.

Today

Today could very well be a day I will consider very special in the future.  It's too soon to talk about now,  but one day I will share, if indeed, it does turn out to be special.  Just couldn't let the day go by without acknowledging a happy happening in my life.

Not saying that word, yet.

I've gotten over the fact that I was TOS'd for talking shit. Where's the fecal humor?

It baffles me that AOL would view that entry as violating Terms of Service. Come on now! I can go to any journal and TOS a person? Does AOL even look at the circumstances or do they just TOS you if someone feels offended? Shouldn't this be given a trial and jury to determine if it is indeed a violation? There is much out there that offends me but, if it does, I stay away from that place.

Where's that thing called Freedom of Speech? No one makes me read anything I don't choose to read. I have free will.

I will admit it may have been in poor taste but I wasn't bad mouthing anyone and I clearly stated at the very beginning, that if it offended, please do not read it. I guess my use of any means to get a laugh must be examined. It's okay to talk about graphic sex but shit is off limits? I think we live in a world that's a bit off kilter where values are concerned.

What happens when you don't ignore the bad behaviors, you end up feeding them and that's basically what happened here. It prompted another entry about feces.

Well, I'm over myself now. It's Thanksgiving night and I ate enough to generate that matter that got me TOS'd.