Today marks the 31st anniversary and the beginning of my career in marriages. Yep, on this day in 1975, I took my first plunge into holy matrimony.
I liked it so much I did it two more times.
Here's to you Brent...you had the distinct pleasure of being my first. 
Because without you I would not have had this, my lovely daughter:
Or this:
My precious grandson, right after birth, along with 5 generations at the hospital to cheer him into the world.
I looked into that bag with such remorse because as much as I love eating every single popped corn, I did look forward to those half popped kernals that we all break our teeth on.
Once I got over my desolation, I decided a little research was in order and I have now a complete knowledge of why this happened: I found that my bag of popcorn apparently did not have any leaky hulls:
INDIANAPOLIS -- Eat your way to the bottom of almost any bag of popcorn and there they are: the rock-hard, jaw-rattling unpopped kernels known as old maids.
The nuisance kernels have kept many a dentist busy, but their days could be numbered: Scientists say they now know why some popcorn kernels resist popping.
Popcorn kernels must have a precise moisture level in their starchy center -- about 15 percent -- to explode. But Purdue University researchers found the key to a kernel's explosive success lies in the composition of its hull.
Unpopped kernels, it turns out, have leaky hulls that prevent the moisture pressure buildup needed for them to pop and lack the optimal hull structure that allows most kernels to explode.
"They're sort of like little pressure vessels that explode when the pressure reaches a certain point," said Bruce Hamaker, a Purdue professor of food chemistry. "But if too much moisture escapes, it loses its ability to pop and just sits there."
'One of life's annoyances'
The findings may help popcorn breeders select the best varieties - - or create new ones -- with superior hulls that yield few unpopped kernels. But for now, there's no way to screen out potential old maids.
Hamaker and his associates compared the microwave popping performance of 14 Indiana-grown popcorn varieties and examined the hulls of both the popped kernels and the duds.
In the varieties popped, the percentage of unpopped kernels ranged from 4 percent in premium brands to 47 percent in the cheaper ones.
The findings could be good news for people who savor the snack and those who grow the 17 billion quarts of popcorn sold each year in the United States.
Wendy Boersema Rappel, a spokeswoman for the Chicago-based Popcorn Board, said processors are always looking for ways to improve their product, including reducing the number of old maids.
"It's one of life's annoyances -- it's not rocking anyone's world, but our members always like to improve their product," Rappel said. AP
Copyright The Chicago Sun-Times, Inc.
Provided by ProQuest Information and Learning Company. All rights Reserved.
It seems that my daughter's phone programming scheme has made some guy feel sorry for her mom.
My daughter is going to die and I will be doing the honors!
My Mother's Day weekend started off lovely with my daughter sending me flowers at work and bringing my grandson to visit with me.
My mother's birthday was Saturday so we travelled two hours to spend the day with her in Texas. We surprised her with flowers and my grandson who she hasn't seen in quite a while.
We travelled back and decided to have a mother - daughter night out at a local club. Her ex co-worker was foot loose and fancy free as well, so off to the Achafalaya Club in Henderson we go for a night of dancing dancing dancing and fun fun fun.
Unbeknownst to me, while I was a tapping my feet, my daughter was soliciting dating material for me. She is my biggest fan and I have to watch her because she thinks EVERYONE should think her mother is as wonderful as she thinks I am. Well, folks, while I was dancing I could see her talking to what seems like everyone in the bar. What I didn't know she was doing (as a joke) was programing my number in these guys cell phones. Can you imagine my surprise, after a night of drinking and dancing and thinking I remembered everything, I get a shitload of phone calls for Mother's Day from every Tom, DICK and Harry at the bar. Oh! but the lil shit underestimates her mother! Imagine her surprise when she started getting phone calls from these same men after I let them know HER phone number. Of course I let her husband know what was going on prior to her receiving calls.
We did have a good time and I met some wonderful people that I'm sure will be some long lasting friendships. My daughter has a way of bringing out that joy in every being she touches. The guys were hanging on her like flies on......., and she being the married woman that she is, she lapped it up and graciously turned their attentions to her two single companions. Bitch!
On my way back from church just now, I saw the funniest thing. Please excuse me but some things strike my funny bone and I have to laugh my butt off. Something about this picture tickled my funny bone
A bodybuilder was walking an itty bitty dog on a leash.
Something about it just didn't look right to me.
I'm sitting here staring at this blank journal page trying to find something profound to say but it seems my profoundness has profoundly decided to profunct itself into profundo!
No! I'm not drinking. I just feel a need to write in my journal and I haven't a thing to say. I don't even have a bad date story to impart upon this unsuspecting world. I'm sure if I sit here long enough I will come up with something but I don't have that much time to waste and I'm sure you guys don't either.
I did have a date Friday and he was normal except for that one air guitar mishap but I forgave him because he was a good dancer. I did meet an air fiddiler a few weeks back. He did the best pool stick fiddle rendition of Charlie Daniel's "Devil Went Down to Georgia" I have ever seen. I wanted to take the pool stick and ram it where the sun don't shine. Anyone who has read my journal knows how I abhor with a passion air instrument players. Reminds me of a dog humping air in aspirations of doing the real thing.
When searching for an animated dog humping I came upon this interesting fact:
Why do dogs hump? Dogs humping humans may amuse other humans, but rarely the human who's being humped. Some dogs will hump a toy or sofa cushion incessantly. We accept dogs humping other dogs in the act of mating, but in other situations it can create problems. What does all this humping mean, and what can we do about it?
Much of the humping you'll see among puppies as well as among adult dogs is play. Some of it expresses dominance, but that's not always the case.
If a dog persists in humping another dog in a social situation, distracting the dog who's doing the humping into another activity is a good idea. For one thing, it's best that a dognot get obsessed with humping. Besides the potentialannoyance to others, it can even result in physical irritation. When you consistently interrupt the humping, you prevent it from becoming a strong habit in the dog.
Secondly, being humped can become oppressive to the dog who is the target, so that's another reason to interrupt. This is a common complaint in situations where dogs get together to play, such as dog parks. Just distract the humping dog, without punishment of any kind.
I wonder if this works with the human male species?
I am alive and well. I've been having a hell of a time trying to keep up with all the Tom, Dick and Harry's of this world.
Unfortunately, I have discovered that there are more Dicks than Tom's or Harry's.
